This topic and the presentation have a great perspective into how different we are and how we perceive each other with this difference in mind.

I really liked how the team presented the differences in their clothing, and how it the topic was not given straight on.

In my own life I have learned to honor differences in other people, just as I expect mine to be honoured. we live in a society that sometimes sees difference as something taboo. we still see difference as a weird thing and each time someone appears to be different we tend to abnormalise them. This I believe to be the problem of society in general. A woman who does not want to be married or to have children is seen as not being normal, but what could be better, a woman who doesn’t want a child and sticks to that or a woman who has a child and then abuses them?

Honouring difference is important and begins with respect for the self and others.

Oby

I must say I really enjoyed this presentation. Life in general can be a puzzle but one needs to find pieces to be put together and make life worth a living.

Ros said something very important, of which it was a ‘aha’ moment. “Life must be understood backward but it must be lived forward.” This means we should all experience our previous days, right our mix-ups assuming any, gain from them and set ourselves up better for the days to come. This is likewise called as experience. Some harsh encounters in the past are the best instructors of our life… In order to grow in life you ask yourself what have you learned with it? What did you do with what you learned in life and lastly what did you learn from what you did.

I can assure you, your life can be so fun to live if you can answer these question because it will give you the perspective on how things work in life no matter how challenging it may be.

Today’s presentation was about reflection, the group started very well with clear objectives, activities aligned to the topic. However at some point the audience was very disconnected the levels of energy were very low no signage between the team.
And to make it worse one of which during the presentation one of the team member spoke vulgar language which shocked the entire audience and most of us switched off as results because we all came to learn not to insult.

The second part of the class we had an interesting class activity where we gave each other feedback based on perception, the aim of this activity was mainly to learn how to give feedback as well as get to know each other at the personal level in this manner we would be able to allocate tasks based on the personality, skills and ability. For me this was a key to firm up our team and get to build that signage for the presentation.

On the other hand the lecture was able to tie up the topic and activities together she went deeper to our mind and took us in a journey of discovery ourselves and be able to take decisions that will favour us.

“You will never find time for anything. If you want time you must make it…” Really? How must I make time if I am a mother, wife, shepherd at church, manager, running a master rebuild centre in a male dominated industry? This type of questioning is time consuming….

I just loved the activities that the group presented on how to BALANCE LIFE. It was so relevant and had a symbolic meaning on each of them for me. The one where you need to balance the nails on one nail AND they are not allowed the touch the ground, that was just on the point for me on how we can use that in our lives. Its possible. You just need the prefect balance. The other activity was filling the bucket with balls, where the biggest balls represented the stuff most important in your life that your need to prioritize, and the small balls the not so important. Even though we were a bit confused on what they need to do, I could relate to the balls.

We also did this test, where we could see whether we were left or right brain dominant, do we like details or see the bigger picture. This was relevant to me as we grouped together with each person having a different trait. Some were investigators as they tend to do more research and want to see the details and making sure they have all the facts, but this was also developed because of the experience they had to go through. Where other are operators and other initiators. This was so profound to me, as the ladies were talking on why they are operators they like to do things themselves, get the ball rolling. Sometimes doing things themselves because they trust on how they do it then anyone else. And it got me thinking, I was like that. I was an operator but because of my experience and the way I had to develop and grow myself, I am now an initiator. I had to learn to let go and delegate and to me the initiator does not really have to be the go-getter, they just need to lead and drive the team to be the go-getters and making sure the task is done.

How funny on how we think life just happens. It is good to get a little perspective on why you do certain things and how you do it. And the end, as you develop and grow, you change on how you would operate and thus changes the way the were and see what you can become. But balancing life is ongoing, you not going to get it right the first time and think oh this is it. Balancing life and learning from life is inevitable… XoXo

This was a very interesting topic. The group presented it very well by creating a little drama showing the real life for women with multiple roles go through. Most women in the class could relate the woman in the drama who had pressure of being a mom who is studying, an employee with deadlines to meet, a wife to a husband who is not working, an  active church member and a sales lady. We are often faced with a lot of responsibilities as women and find it hard to find a balance .  The group that presented  gave us a very challenging activity of balancing 10 nails on one nail. It seemed impossible  and stressful in the beginning but with guidance we managed to get it right. The game taught me patience and tolerance. It only when I stopped stressing and focused that I managed to the trick right together with the group I was working with .

The interesting thing that we did which I really enjoyed was the assessment on brain dominance , sensory preference, information sorting styles and learning style. This activity helped me understand myself and what I need from other people in order to be the best I can be. I have leaned that I am 89% left brain which  means that I am sequential, time orientated and logical . I am more auditory than visual. I prefer detail over big picture. My  learning style are more of operator and investigator and less of initiator and Theorist.   

Hello 🙂

This week’s class was a bit of an eye opener, the topic, “Personal Reflection” is quite unique as I kept asking myself the following question: What is self reflection?

The groups presentation and the facilitation afterwards covered my areas of concern in this manner: Self reflection is like looking into a mirror and describing what you see. It is a way of assessing yourself, your ways of working and how you study. To put it simply ‘reflection’ means to think about something. Even though the assessment section was rather painful as the group members were crucified by us observers and it a hard pill to swallow.

One of the most important things that the class missed was the fact that the group had an insightful topic and we all missed that because we were all looking for a perfect illustration. I for one, reflecting on myself for instance helps me to develop my personal skills and to review their effectiveness, rather than just carry on doing things the way I have always been doing them. It is about questioning the inner soul, in a positive way, what I do and why I do it and then deciding whether there is a better, or more efficient, way of doing it in the future.

In general, when we learn we can become stuck in a routine that may not be working effectively for us as individuals. Thinking about my own skills can help me identify changes that I might need to make. Although self reflection seems difficult at first and it is to be honest embarrassing to do, because it does not come naturally. I will keep on trying and hopefully with practice I will find it easier and I’m hoping that the end result would be a happier and get to meet an efficient ME.

The following weekend its our turn as a group to be on the hot seat!!!

Push …let’s go!!

This past week’s presentation and facilitation was especially welcome, I think everybody could relate in their own way. Balancing life’s demands is what will separate those who are great and those who are mediocre.

I struggle with the balancing act myself, there’s just so much going on, particularly this period, submissions on submissions! It helps to have a schedule and to plan time according to what needs my attention- prioritizing is key, as stated by our presenting group. Luckily for me, I’m not as busy as some, who might have families of their own or spouses, or pets- all commitments that cannot be ignored… Even so, I am under a lot of pressure to perform well, graduate, and move along to greatness…

Reflecting back on the presentation and going through what I’m going through with all the deadlines and demands from life, my aha moment came when I just felt so overwhelmed by everything that I decided to step back and watch an episode of The Throne *shocked monkey emoji* OOOPS lol. Anyways, I realized that I was investing too much energy in what the possible outcomes of my limited time would be. Instead of stressing and worsening my anxieties, I decided to step back and clear my mind with an enjoyable activity- while I don’t promote procrastinating, I do suggest taking some time out to just breathe, good mental health is important for staying on top of your game. Staying on top of my game requires me to be in a good space and for me, a part of that is doing things I enjoy once in a while..

AKA Balancing Life. I enjoyed the skit enacted by this team – I could personally relate as a mother, student, employee, intentional Christian/disciple, daughter, friend, etc… Today’s lesson showed the importance of prioritizing. The team shared how in order to have a perfectly balanced life, once needed to allocate approximate 40 minutes to activities which mattered to them after work, travel and sleep had taken their share. An obviously unrealistic target, the ultimate lesson was, as I encapsulate it, that we should seek harmony – in some seasons, some areas of life will demand more from you that in other – it is important to give attention to what is necessary when it is necessary.

This, I have learnt, requires discipline, being comfortable with being unpopular and giving weight to the things that matter… This is a tough lesson for me as embedded within my personality is pleasing people and gaining their approval. It has led to much dissatisfaction as I often pursue the aims of others or allow war to wage within me from forces external to me – be bother by things which are not truly MY priority. I hope to gain confidence in this, especially as I work toward the end of my first academic qualification. I need to find that harmony that resonates with ME.

Arg…. reflective lesson this one… more so than Personal Reflection, lol *hides*

reflections presentation was insightful in that it pushed one to introspect the various areas of one’s life. Its allowed one to truly embrace the imperfection and understand them for what they are. That imperfection are not cemented on one’s character,when considered in a positive light they may be used to strengthen one’s character.

The lecture on Four fold way, was very interesting and thought provoking. it emphasizes on taking ownership and reclaiming personal power by allowing one to lead from behind sometimes. Experience vulnerability and don’t see it as a weakness,and also learning to tell the truth without blaming or passing judgement which is extremely difficult to practice in the world pushes for excellence.

Ralph Waldo Emerson- “In times when we thought ourselves indolent, we have afterwards discovered that much was accomplished, and much was begun in us. All our days are so unprofitable while they pass, that ’tis wonderful where or when we ever got anything of this which we call wisdom, poetry, virtue. We never got it on any dated calendar day.”

I will just open with this quote from Ralph Emerson….as I try to reflect into this topic of personal reflection. For me it entails stripping yourself naked and deal with you, one-on-one. it is afterall a “personal reflection”. You look at yourself whether its in the mirror or by merely having an imagination of yourself and your life.

I like doing it, as its one point of self-reflection and gets you to a point of seeing where you are, what you have done to get there, and how to move on. A profound state and one I believe each individual should try to do for themselves, and not to beat on yourself but to see how you can work on yourself and improve. It highlights our strengths and weaknesses and gives a new perspective. One can take a lot from personal reflections, it all depends on how you view things and what you are willing to do to change if there is change required.

I liked the group task we did, where the group members had to do the “what makes you great in my eyes” task. To hear what people have to say or their view of you, is amazing! Reminds me of a song by Lizz Wright…where she is just earger to hear what other people think about her… a mirror in itself. One thing I took from this is that however way you see someone, that also reflects in you.

May we continue to do personal reflections, and see more beautiful ways of evolving! 

Im glad to have been a part of this session! 😉

Oby

I recall a friend saying “before I go to sleep instead of going through my phone like most people do I reflect on my entire days activities” Connie. Looking at the positives and negatives, what she could have changed and what stood out for her.

Today’s facilitation class was trully deep for me. I realised that I do not give back to myself as often as I give back to others. And that for me to grow as a person I need to start making time for myself to reflect on a daily basis, by that I mean not pushing back the negatives at the back of my mind and chosing not to ponder on them instead learn from how I can better manage those situations.

I enjoyed the mirror excise the team used as part of their activities. This was an eye opener for me, it made me realise that I do not give as much credit to myself as I should by utilising the tools I am surrounded by. I have started singing sweet things to myself every morning as I prepare myself for work. The same mirror that I use to ensure that I am presentable is the same one I have started allocating 5minutes off to, in order to remind myself that I am more than capable of taking on the world. I mean if I don’t tell that to myself, who will?

What I take out from all of this is that Self Love has for most of us been Self Taught. Especialy after learning about the strory of the two wolves. I chose to do things differently with my children. I chose to nurture as well as teach them to also nurture the positive wolf in them so they can grow up knowing they more than capable of achieving everything they put their minds to. I chose not to focus on what my son cannot do rather tell him how great he is in everything even if he sucks at it. This lesson for me is a generation changer the best lesson I can ever give to the next generation. I have started laughing at myself for the little mistakes that I do. Biggest lesson out of this, even with the mistakes we do, life can still be enjoyed as long as we put a little laughter to it.

Potso!

Learning agility is being able to learn, adapt and make sense of uncertainty before applying ourselves in our current volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous world. It was said in the course pack that people with high levels of agility are able to learn quickly, in a number of ways and are able to apply their learning to succeed in their set out task. Now, although this all makes sense for me, I cannot help but wonder if there are some sort of loopholes in this process. My immediate thought goes to psychological disorders and how a mental disability could affect the learning agility of a person. I would have to do a lot of research on it though to have a full understanding, but it is definitely something that I needed to put in this blog. I mean we need to look back at them after-all right?

For this class we needed to complete the questionnaire on learning styles. Whilst I found that most of the information that was’spat out’ at the end of the test was correct, there were some for which I have HUGE disagreements. The analytical me has of course gone the extra mile to work through the data and look at percentages and relationships. So bare with me whilst I complain about my results like a true unsatisfied student.

Firstly, A and B, Left brain or right brain. I already know that I work more with my left brain that my right brain so it wasn’t a surprise that I scored higher there… but by one point. I am both analytical and creative. I am analytically creative! Which is awesome, but the test gives 9 questions which means that there will have to be one side stronger than the other. No matter what the outcome was. The same happened in the number of questions for the information sorting styles and the motivation preferences. These two I’m not necessarily complaining about because in both there was an outright answer. I am OCD so I always focus on the detail and the internal preferences. I’m not a fan of seeing the big picture if you don’t know the nitty gritty, and external preferences mean people… I’m not a fan of people and their judgment. But nine questions means that there is no chance of getting a 50/50 answer. There will always be a larger side. There has to be.

Sensory Preferences. Well when I was still in junior school I did a test to see my sensory preferences and it came up with reading and writing… This wasn’t part of the test, so either it was left out of this one or the other one lied. Also, I would never peck myself with an auditory sensory preference?

Finally, learning styles… I’m an initiator and then an operator? the first means that I am extroverted and being thrown into the deep-end. Well This can just have a big red cross drawn right through it. I am anything but an extrovert. In fact in am an introverted introvert. I am more than the complete opposite. But I can agree that O like to try new ideas and techniques and I am pretty practical so maybe I am an undercover initiator. Then and operator says that I am comfortable with unpredicted change and a people person. I’ve been told that I am great with people but to be honest, they scare me. Unpredictable change is a no-no for me. I mean I have OCD. I like things to be in order and planned in advance. If it isn’t or if it changes then I get anxious and panic.

Okay, so let me sum it up…

I have two dominant hemispheres but my left brain seems to be edging into the lead. I work a lot better with detail and I have many many internal preferences (control, low trust in others and high trust in myself). I am a visual learner but more so auditory and I am am initiator and operator who happens to be extremely introverted… Hmmm…

It was an eye opening,mind boggling presentation of freeing one’s mind and seeing things with new eyes.

The lesson of it all was that for us to conquer our fears/phobia we have to face them head on, but take it one step at a time. Otherwise we allow that to rule our mind. Every choice and experience in our lives has contributed to our current state of health and the onus lies with us to manage or deal with it effectively and not allow it to define us.

The team taught us about the body tapping technique/body talk which teaches one to self heal by tapping certain body parts to trigger the feel good hormones. It says each system,cell and atom of the body is in constant communication with each other and the deep connection these systems have, brings about healing.

My lesson-change starts today with me,with a set mind and a willing heart I can do it.  A free mind  can conquer anything!

Today was a long day.

We started class at 08:00 till 16:30.  The day was draining for me.  I even had to go outside for 5 minutes just to “find” myself.

Anyway, interesting day it was.  Two groups presented.  Seeing with new eyes group presented in the morning.  What an eye opener it was.  I was wowed by this topic, by the group, the energy and all.  Anyway,

The grouped asked us to bring old pair of shoes, that was on email during the week.  I was wondering, why on earth should we be bringing old shoes for.

The class started, the group asked us to bring the old shoes forward, and then asked us to take any pair from the old pairs to wear.  That was an immediate NO from me.  Wearing another person’s shoes, let alone, an old pair, I couldn’t.  There were mixed feelings in the class for this.

The group started presenting – and engaging us in the topic.  The topic was an eye opener.  It was an emotional class for me, as my head started being filled about, not everyone is privileged to have and to afford BASIC things.  Things that we take for granted.  The old shoes that you don’t want, to another person they will be something that they treasure.

I have learnt to be grateful for my life, for the job that I have, for the food that I have for the clothes for EVERYTHING that I have, I am so grateful.

This group just opened my eyes and my heart.

Freeing your mind 🙂

This here, was my group’s topic.  Can I just start by saying I have met wonderful people on this group.  Everyone is “an easy person” to just talk, laugh, joke, be serious with.

When I first heard of the topic, I asked “haibo, freeing my mind from what? freeing it like a bird”, I laughed at this topic.  When I sat down at thought about it – I said to my self, “this is powerful”.  All individuals have burdens, stresses.  If you are poor, wealthy – there is some stress that you are going through.  Every individual have “things to deal with”.

Anyway, as a group we discussed, on our whatzup chat.  We practiced individually in our spare times.  One was just talking from the heart or from life experiences.

The day came, we facilitated.  We involved the class, asking them how they were feeling.  Everyone in the class participated.  The joy I felt as we were just facilitating from the heart.. It was overwhelming.

We showed the group how to TAP..TAPPING..
Tapping is a unique was of relieving stress  while you are at home, in the office or even while you are driving.  The technique works wonders.  It relieves stress and calms one down.

The afternoon group did a good job in their presentation as they illustrated that; no matter how good, intelligent, rich, or influential you may be, no man is an island. In their illustration, they formed three groups of people with about five people per group. The challenge was to see which group was going to be able to place the hola-hoop on the floor with all the team members collaborating as per instruction. It was interesting to note that without proper communication and collaboration the task could not be achieved as a group. As human beings we are interconnected and need each other in one way or another.

I also learned a few relaxation techniques which I believe will help me cope whenever I find myself in a panic state because of stage fright before a presentation at work; and also during exam time when I get panic attacks.

So for this week facilitation piece, which was about “Seeing with new eyes” we had to bring in an old pair of shoes.Sounds quite interesting and I was keen to see what the group was going to do.
When we arrived we had to put the shoes we had bought with us in a basket. The group then started their facilitation piece and asked the class to go pick out a pair of shoes from the basket. The class proceeded to go and pick a pair of shoes- either their own or someone else’s.
Then we were asked to put the shoes on, at this point it was interesting to note how we all reacted! Some of the class were reluctant to put on the shoes whereas others tried to put on the shoes they had picked.
The lesson for me from this facilitation was that we sometimes have to step into someone’s shoes to understand and realise what they are experiencing and living.
We sometimes make judgement’s and have preconceived ideas about people yet we have not taken the time to ask or listen to their story.
I hope that I can take the lesson learnt today in class, and apply it in my life when interacting not only with my colleagues at work but in other spheres of my life.

Change is something that is very uncomfortable even though in some instances it is for the better. For me 2018 has been a year of CHANGE. I was opening and I  refused to rely on the way I do things. This topic is very close to my heart as I have chosen to embrace change and not run away from it. I believe it is always an on opportunity to discover something new, leave bad habits and just grow.

One thing I will use going forward is the  domains of disclosure which are Public, Private, and Unconscious and  Johari’s window which is the awareness of self and others, Transparent,
Hidden, Blind and Unknown.

This definitely helps one be more aware of themselves, surrounding and people around them.

Today was “the mother of all sessions”! This was mainly because it was our group’s turn to present. Our topic was …Seeing with new eyes. As soon as we had been put together as a group and knew when we were going to be presenting; we quickly formed a Whatsapp group for the purposes of easy and convenient communication. Soon a meeting was set up where we would get together to draw up the plan going forward.

As agreed, the group met during the following week. A plan was then agreed on how we were going to approach the delivery of the task at hand, and everyone was allocated a task with time frames. It was quite interesting to see the diverse personalities that subsequently emerged amongst the group. As we were progressing with our individual tasks; we also tried to keep each other in the loop by keeping regular communication going. After toying around with a couple of ideas, we eventually agreed that we will use homelessness as the backdrop for seeing with new eyes. This followed after one of the group members had shared how she had been part of a group in her place of work that went out to try and address the issues of homeless people. They had apparently decided as the management team that for them to know the real issues that these people were dealing with on a daily basis; they had to be part of them and experience this first hand. A group of them agreed to go and live on the streets of Johannesburg for forty (40) days….which I thought was very brave!

Having been on the streets for that long, this colleague shared with us some of the most gruesome experiences that she had. I had always thought that life on the streets was hard, but not until I heard the story that was related to us did I realize that life on the streets is shrewd! I was shocked to learn of the treatment that “we” the ordinary and well-off people were giving to the homeless people. I was further surprised during my research to learn about some of the famous people that were at some point in their lives also homeless. For me the startling realisation that it can happen to anyone, was the most scary thought. One of the catch phrases that was used by someone in the group was…”you are one pay cheque away from being homeless”. The realities of life on the streets looked so much of a possibility, it was scary.

As the time was drawing closer for us to present; the meetings got more and more. The expectations for delivery by the group members also grew. As they say, things were heating up! Deadlines were soon approaching and we needed to have things together. As the pressure mounted, some of the group members also started slacking. One evening when we realised that things were in fact not going according to plan, we held a meeting and tough decisions were taken that brought all of us back on track. The plan was that we would all bring old shoes and also request the rest of the class to do the same. People would then be asked to pick a pair of shoes and wear them, just so that they get a feel of what the homeless people have to live with. The night before we did a practice run and everyone was satisfied that we were ready.

Eventually the big day arrived, and the team arrived bright and early to allow time to set up the venue. To our disappointment, the guy who had been allocated the task of being the time keeper and to see to the overall smooth running, did not show up! Phone calls were made to his number, but the guy just did not pick up. We had to quickly come up with a plan to close the unexpected gap. When the class was ready, we then proceeded with our facilitation. Judging from the feedback that we received, it all went quite well.

There was a great sense of relief once we were done; but it had not gone by with no learning. Looking back; there was a lot of effort that went into managing the different personalities that were in the team. I can safely attribute most of the success to the fact that from the word go, rules of the game had been clearly set out and everyone tried to keep to them. During instances where we had a difference in opinion; people would respectfully state their views and even the domineering characters would from time to time find a way of driving themselves back into being part of the group. I must admit that ours was a resounding success and thanks to the maturity shown by everyone that was a member of this group. My biggest learning from this exercise was that things are not always as they seem; sometimes we need to look at things with new eyes! The group dynamics did to a large extent take care of themselves because of the nature of the relationship we had managed to establish at the early formation stages of the group.

The member of the group who did not show up on the day of the presentation was unfortunately left out as he also informed us of his decision to de-register for the course…Sorry, his loss!!

“One pay cheque away from being homeless” a scary thought for me at the time as my husband lay in bed fighting for his life. I watched my  group from the door as they  landed  seeing the homeless with new eyes. Am humbled by the generosity of this group. They inspired many including myself to do more in giving back to the less fortunate.

Week 5 – Seeing with new eyes

Lesson learned from the group that was facilitating is that never take what you for granted because tomorrow might find myself being homeless because sometimes being homeless is not by choice.  

The second part of the session had me thinking how unconsciously biased I’ve been toward others especially those that share the same interests (Similarity bias) where I would surround myself or being in a company of people I consider to be “my own” – How  we gravitated towards others. This has opened my eyes that one way or the other, we all have unconscious biases and at times it’s unintentional, and that we need to break limiting stereotypes. Lately I find myself actively checking out others to see if there’s any biasness in them including myself – Am I now being judgemental🤷🏽‍♀️, I’m confused. 

We also touched on perceptions, that it varies from person to person and how two people can see the same thing or hear the same word (double clicking) but interpret differently. 

Unfortunately the day was too long and my concentration levels were depleted and challenged and I started drifting away…

This topic resonates with an exercise we did in class. “the left/right” thinking structures of the mind. Having understood how it is that people form their thinking patterns was not only informative, but it also cultivated a tolerance I never had towards thinkers that did not mirror my own patterns. I am yet to acquire the patience required to sustain my tolerance, but the enlightenment is definitely there, which I consider to be a good start.

Today was a full day class, morning was combined with the afternoon class. It was indeed a full house as we waited outside as the morning syndicate group got ready to facilitate. As we entered the classroom room we were welcomed and instructed to put the shoes we were told to bring into baskets.

We all sat down and a minute later were were told to take any pair of shoes to fit and majority of us refused. This was part of the facilitation topic seeing with new eyes. They discussed Homelessness. When homeless people are, given something they do not judge but accept with two open arms.

We did a couple of exercise in small groups:

“Recall a time when you felt something significant, a time when you felt alive, involved and enthusiastic about what you were doing”

“What do you believe they say about us, family, community and the world?”

AFTER LUNCH:

Freeing your mind was the topic the second syndicate group facilitated

They dressed in black and used emoji’s for their topic, which was very informative.

I learnt about the EFT method, which helps overcome fear, the Tap routine which also helps to be happy and stress free

We listened to a track by Eminem my favourite rapper, the song was an example of unconscious Bias and we discussed it in detail.

My other learning was that context matters, more so than we realise. Setting the right context can change the perception, it can create a different outcome. This is something we could use in our professional and personal lives, it can affect the results from the team that you manage in a professional setting and it can also affect the kind of relationships you build and maintain with friends and family. My reflection was more about how I could set the tone and environment for my HR team to be successful, to be inspired and to reach their true potential.

What a day, I was finished…………

The topic has made to see life through the different lenses from the ones that I have been using. I have learned that I should receive what life offers to me. The story of the homeless was painful. I will continue to thrive to succeed and be a better person in life and will always put myself in someone shoes and never shift the blame on what is happening to me. This has reminded me of the saying that life is what you make out of it.

Life is a journey and everyone is responsible for their journey. Never in life forget that wheel can turn. Be grateful for what you have and always live for now because life is something that is being borrowed to us by the creator. There is time everything and it is vital that we make the best of what we have now.

Wow this facilitation and the topic has really opened my eyes. Often we are very judgemental about other people situation and environment. The idea of shoes has triggered my sense of seeing life with different eyes because should the table turn around regarding our privileges and be in a situation similar to those in the streets, how would one survive? The homeless in the streets survive by receiving what has been offered not by choice or anything. Appreciation in one’s position is the most important thing and be able to apply humour and respect of others when they need you the most. I am moved by this topic and learning from life doesn’t stop.

i enjoyed the group that was presenting, they were well prepared. well not like i expected less, i mean this was the 5th week. they started with a little drama that they had prepared and then facilitated their topic. it was nice. this are the things that i learned from today’s class
when resolving conflict these are the things that must be taken into consideration
Agree on a mutually acceptable time and place to discuss the conflict.
State the problem as you see it and list your concerns. …
Let the other person have his/her say. …
Listen and ask questions. …
Stick to one conflict at a time — to the issue at hand. …
Seek common ground.

This was the first week of a full day lecture ** yawn yawn** was not looking forward to this day at all.

The topic for this week morning facilitation was seeing with new eyes” we were told by the team the previous week that we needed to bring in old shoes, when we got to class we had to leave the old shoes that we brought in front of the class in a basket, once we all were seated and ready for the facilitation piece one of the team members instructed us to come to the front and pick a pair of shoes that we did not bring from the basket, once we all had a different pair of shoes we were then instructed to put those shoes on (eeeuwww) IMAGINE putting on some else’s shoes, majority of the class did not as the response were that the shoes were small, unhygienic and uncomfortable.

One team member explained her personal story by going undercover and being as a homeless person for 40 days as a research project, lesson learned was that homeless people are seen as invisible and we do not know the story for being in the place that they are, whatever they are given they appreciate and do not question where it came from. We as humans just assume that they are drug addicts and that is how they must have landed in the situation that they are in, I learned that it can happen to any one of us, we should all be grateful for the little things that we have, one minute we have it the next we don’t. I have definitely started looking at homeless people from a new set of lens.

After the facilitation piece Roslyn introduced the different types of unconscious biases, and how we make judgments’ at the speed of light by what we see without evening realizing it, our biases are influenced by our background, culture, beliefs, values and personal experiences.

We see the world through our own lenses, and we are wired to make assumptions, we select what we want to hear and see, then project what we have seen and heard to confirm our perceptions, this is known as a self-fulfilling prophecy, our Reticular Activating system processes all the information that we hear and see first, RAS filters all the information that we take in first. Interesting stuff 🙂

I also learned that assumptions determine how we see a situation from our own lens, how we interpret a story, leads to the way we feel, which is lead to a conclusion with an assumption to fit the picture that we have created unconsciously.

A long day that ended up being very informant 🙂

Wow, what an eye opener for sure. Through this entire facilitation I wondered why were we asked to bring an OLD pair of shoes, why would I give something to someone that I don’t use because i find it of no use to me anymore as it is ‘old?!

So I consciously chose to bring a rather new pair of shoes to class instead,  I mean would this make the person on the receiving end feel completely special!

The lesson that I took away from today’s lesson is that you don’t always have to give away something that you think is old and of no use to you, challenge yourself even further by giving a way something that you love and is of great use an value to you instead of giving away something that you never use or completely despise.

The lesson learnt is placing yourself at the receiving end of being given a gift. How would your dignity be tarnished if the gift you received was tacky, old and warn.

My looking in from the balcony moment was seeing how much more grateful and precious someone would feel by being given something new and loved.

The term “free your mind” can mean many things to a number of people.  When the group facilitated this topic that was more interesting and how we free our minds from things that suffocates us in our daily lives such as frustration, anxiety, fear and disappointment. Some people deal with problems just like everyone else done, some people may not be strong enough and end up committing suicide. They also shared an acronym called “EFT” which means emotional freedom techniques and alternative treatment for physical pain and emotional distress. How can stimulate these meridian points by tapping on them just by tapping on them by your fingertips, this simply means tapping into your body’s own energy and healing power. What is so wonderful is the ability to set the mind free and knowing that there is no longer any excuse for one to be overwhelmed with unhappiness. These are a few tips to help us learn how to free our minds and letting go of things that may suffocates our happiness.

What will facilitation be without group exercise when Roslyn ask us to recall a moment when you felt part of something significant, which could be a time you felt alive, involved, energized and enthusiastic about what you were doing. Believe you me, it took a lot of time to recall and share with my team actually most of us in my team, and that made me realise how much we don’t appreciate the great times that happens in our lives. The exercise was very great to share and to listen to each other when my peers shared those moments it was an Aahaa! moment for me cause it really stood out because we don’t appreciate the things that are happening in our lives no matter the impact. It made me wonder, why we do not appreciate such. However if it was more about what hurts us at a time where someone made you upset and made you feel like your where thrown under the bus, that would have a quick response and that is a sign that we store so much pain in our hearts. We find it hard to forget the bad done to us, rather than celebrate the good we have and embrace the beautiful things in our lives.

What is truly the condition of our interior in any interaction? What is this offence, if any, often unspoken yet influencing so much of our expression and experience? What are the politics of our inner experience that we have this lived experience? How do we learn?

A full day’s class on freeing our minds and seeing with new eyes. It entrilling to find out how one’s mind works, ways in which we learn. This opened way to the many simple ways a conflict ensues and frustration takes form. It also provided new ways in which given this knowledge and resources one can thrive. I absolutely loved this session. Exposing our individual biases and the things that we often assume are different about us but yet so similar.

We took a moment to walk, rather wear another’s shoes and attempt a walk there in. Mosotho a re: bohloko ba seeta bo utlw’wa ke monga sona. In the spirit of honouring difference, we will learn a different language. Find therefore a Sesotho speaking person and have them teach you the meaning of the above and the pronunciation of the words so you may read on your own and to others too. Offer yourself the freeing exercise of seeing anew. And we took time to debrief and detox from our pains and busy lives by tapping into our emotional space thereby accessing that intelligence and learning techniques to free ourselves from emotional clutter of our fast paced lives.

It was such a fulfilling class. It opened our eyes to conditioning and gave us the awareness to be alert and mindful of those thoughts and things we pay much attention to. It also highlighted the privileged tones from which some of us speak from especially in that exercise of what the words: poor, rich, integrity and wealth mean, to us.

I was moved by compliment from a classmate. I have so much to say about that moment but I am not sure if the space is safe enough yet. But I will say to my colleague, I am glad to be seen. I see you!

Today’s lesson:mind your heart. take care to know yourself. laugh at how fellable you are.

you are ok! we get it right eventually,
in the words of the 3 idiots: Al iz wel.

—Rethabile

This week’s topic was quite emotional (I didn’t cry or anything like that) it just really hit me hard, because I see these homeless people on a daily basis, I refer to them as “these people or those people” but why do I refer to them as though they are less than human? why do I think I am different from “them” am I better? What makes me think they are less? Do I even know who they were before they landed on the streets, have I stopped to think about that or are they just invisible to me?

These are the questions I started asking myself while the syndicate group continued to facilitate. It became clear to me that I never really give a second glance to a homeless person, I never ask myself what could have happened to this person, and then a funny thought just came to mind… Whenever we face extreme whether especially at night I often think about people who don’t have shelter, I wonder how they survive, so maybe I do think of them in my own weird way but just cannot bare to think of their reality and what they go through each day, I don’t want to think of their hardships because it somewhat makes life very unfair and unbalanced.

In conflict, one could be the best they can be.  The only thing that can change is you.  You take personal responsibility to be in this place at this time. There is the difference between taking responsibility and taking action. Ros gave an example of a person driving past an accident, the person can decide to pass or stop. However, what remain is the consequences. Conflict was described as a disagreement between two parties. Few ways were shared on how to deal with conflict. We have learnt that some people would decide to avoid dealing with problems, some would just tolerate others just to end conflict and some just conform to whatever that is put on the table to have a peaceful conversation. Energetic conflict is when you always find a way to resolve issues.  Conflict is about the space between me and you.

An advise that stood out was that:

• Never resolve problems because we see the world our own way.
• Take responsibility on how you respond to incidents.
• Take in consideration you won actions, biasness, perceptions before you reach a conclusion to a situation.
• The path of protection and evolution is influenced by your own thoughts and actions
• Seeing with different eyes assists in resolving conflicts

We listened to a song retracted from the 8 Miles movie by Eminem. In the song the rapper is setting groups against each other by creating an in-group and out-group biasness.  I learnt that the things we learn from famous people create extreme out group biasness and unconscious biasness can be subtle.

The ice berg taught us about how we select data from what we see or hear and make decisions. The decision spiral also argues that we sense data, select information, interprets data then assume. The data we select reinforces our believes.  We see the world through our own lenses and distort the truth to fit our own picture of the world. We never know what other people are up to until they tell us. Our work as human being is to lower the water line. We all have Reticular Activating System that controls what goes to our brain. This system responds to anything that is perceived as threat to our survival.  It allows us to see what we want to see.

This was the day my team facilitated. We knew that 30 minutes was going to be tight. When we were in the dance it flew by like a thief in the night. I had so much fun facilitating. Just sad that we ran out of time and had quickly run through our facilitation. I found something new that I can polish on and maybe take it further than the class…🤔🤔.

#MyGroupIsAwsome

Seeing with new eyes means put yourself in someone else’s shoes, try and picture yourself being them, living their life, doing what they doing. Sometimes as people we live in our own world and we only picture the world as how we want it to be and how we think it should be, and we forget that there is a totally different world out there and people are living different. Some have it good and some have it bad, we tend to make assumptions of where people come from based on what we see. We take things at face value without any further investigation as to why certain things are the way are, why they find themselves in that particular situation. I believe in life we should not judge people as we don’t know their stories, we should not make assumptions because it’s dangerous it can sometimes hurt people. Life gets hard at times and to face challenges in life is hard already and we can’t still be dealing with people being judgmental and making assumptions of things they don’t know.

It was our turn to facilitate. I was so stressed! My team and I arrived early in class so we can set up the class and prepare our routine. 5 minutes before we start we realized that 2 of our team members were missing in action. I agreed to take on the one part and another team member agreed to take on the other person part.

After the facilitation was done I felt like we did well. We received mostly positive feedback and people were telling us how confident we looked – if they only knew how I was shaking like a leaf while I was talking.

Next, we did an exercise where we had to recall a time when we felt something significant, a time when we felt alive, involved and enthusiastic about what we were doing.

This had to have been the most challenging week to date. The days extended lecture really pushed boundaries with information overload and having to maintain focus. On the up side I had the great pleasure and honour of presenting along with my group on the theme of “Freeing your Mind”.  Well the pressure to do good was really turned up after the morning groups presentation on “Seeing Through Different Eyes”. They drove this point home by encouraging us to see the homeless through a different lens.  So often the homeless become invisible to us as we go about our daily lives not even noticing them. More often than not when we do in fact notice the homeless we are so quick to pass judgement on their circumstance. We make our own assumptions and immediately write them off as damaged. we stereotype the homeless as thugs, druggies, alcoholics etc. We label them as the delinquents of society yet if we took the time to understand their circumstance we may see them differently. Some of the worlds  most successful people were once homeless too.  I also thought it was heartfelt that they really got each of us thinking about our social responsibility through the gifting of old shoes for charity. Now if this alone was not enough of a tough act to follow, my group and I had the added pressure of making sure we presented our shared topic to the absolute best of our ability. Yes I say shared , as there was an additional group presenting on the very same topic of freeing your mind and using EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) as a tool to alleviate stress associated with feeling emotionally trapped. That being said I believe, all three groups which presented on this day did an amazing job.

We had discussions on Hemingway’s Iceberg Theory which suggests that we react based on our own perceptions. These perceptions however are not always reality as they are seen through our own lens. Hemingway’s Iceberg Theory further argues that these perceptions are influenced by our own mental paradigms which are hidden and structured on our assumptions, beliefs, values, personal experiences and biases. Therefore when we react based on our perceptions we often make unconscious biases because of our hidden mental paradigms. This theory was very confusing to grasp at first but was soon realized when we did the exercise on the girl and the sailor. This exercise really gave insight to how quickly we are at stereotyping and making assumptions in our day to day lives and how important it is to really think about what we are thinking.

Wow. A lesson well learnt. Seeing with New Eyes: my eyes were definitely opened to this lesson. This weeks facilitation group provided a true insight of the possible thoughts and feelings of those we walk away from, those we see on the side of the road each day and just throw up our hands with nothing to offer. Annoyed at the simple sight of them as they approach our cars looking for a small piece of humanity.
What was most awakening, was the very thought that it could happen to anyone of us or our loved ones, almost in an instant.
New found appreciation for what I have, it may not be much, but it is a whole lot more than some of our people out on the street.