my group presented on the topic on the 22nd of September. we focused on the perception of public holidays.
as many as there are public holidays in this country of our so are contests about them. this days are made to commemorate key occurrences in our history and some feel as though they have lost their meaning. some of the days as it was raised in the group are discriminatory towards people’s beliefs and unfairness arises.
the question that arose was that with regards to celebrating these holidays is there a prescribed way of celebrating them and if so who prescribes it?
as I reflect I realize that unlike mathematics how we celebrate or honour the different things in our lives varies and depends on how significant we deem them to be. there is no formula it is just about how you do it and does it satisfy you by doing things in that way.
we might not agree on how to best or suitable honour occasions such as Youth day however we all share the common belief that they are important and should be honored. the shared understand is that the how part is solely up to the individual.!!
in my view conflict needs to be mitigated however it is essential that the approach to the mitigation should be done in a cautionary manner. Conflict occurs when he people in the situation become too attached . as people we tend to personalize things and make it more about us than the issue that is causing the conflict. In attempting to resolve conflicts we also need to consider other people’s feelings and especially their viewpoint. its ok for someone to differ with you
we need to learn to listen more to understand than to respond, as much as we all agreed during this class that conflict necessitates change , I am left wondering if it is necessary to resolve the conflict . the question am left with is that can we just not acknowledge the presence of and not force or insist resolving it? I have come to realize that the journey to resolving conflict brings about unconscious bias, were we often impose our beliefs of right and wrong on to others and when not in agreement it is where the conflict starts.
its okay to agree to disagree. we usually learn the most when we stand in opposing views but bring them together for the purpose of learning!!
I used to think it a myth that a person could go to school to learn one thing and come out even more.
when we were made to mark our colleagues Essays unexpected as it was to some it was pointless and some people felt like why because we will not learn anything. boy were they wrong. I learn that the journey that this course has been to each and everyone of us has been different but impactful. the essays that we marked although we narrate the story differently but it is the same. we all went on a an unexpected but welcomed journey of self discovery and betterment. to some of us the strength’s which we prided ourselves in at some point if not often are our weakness we learnt. some of the things we deemed as shame because of this course we got shame them and realized that we are empowering and inspiring others.
I highly recommend this course to anyone today and in future!!
prior to doing this course I used to think that when it came to social media and the web I held it down. I remember when Roslyn mentioned Blogging the first thing that came to mind was ” yeah I got this”, dear universe I retract that thought!!!
half the time when am on this site I do not know where to go or what to do, it often reminds me of the first time when I had to walk down town Joburg during first year and I was fresh from Botlokwa. you get warned that you shouldn’t ask anyone for directions because Jozi is full of tsosi’s but then here its a different case. even if I do ask for help and the person responds here chances are am not going to be able to find the comment in time just like am only discovering the how to guide today by accident I should add (hides face). But ales I have learned how to do it and just maybe its time I started that food blog(wink) I couldn’t find the emoji for this (ssshhhhhhhh)
Lord have mercy!!!
we did an exercise this week which to one person might have been a simple drawing but it stuck with me and is still haunting me today.
in the exercise we had to draw a timeline for our lives and indicate high’s and lows. even the person that I was paired with realized that mine ha more lows than high. I realized in this that honesty with the self is of more significant than anything. I am not sure if this was a conscious decision or not but I have large chunks of my childhood which are a blur to me. those that I do recall none of them are happy memories.
The most important lesson I got from that class was from the Johari window, in that in as much as we like to preach certain things to people we first need to practice it. the 1st step is to first be honest with yourself about who and what you are and what you can do, from then you can better understand your life and be able to help others do as well. we tend to portray certain characters to other people and at the end our own life ends up being difficult, as we then feel pressure to live lives which we are not comfortable with just to keep up appearances.
From reading all the comments from my fellow students it appears missing the two classes has really robbed me out of a very interesting and informative day. however thankfully my health is back to what it should so there will be no more missing in action.
its funny how now with this class I approach things especially at work differently. I have a supervisor who like me talks a lot and we often but heads as our characters are similar. however now when we butt heads instead of taking her head on I step on to the balcony and just observe. when she has calmed down a bit I do the same with her and we usually realize a big fuss over a tiny thing was made. peace reigns again in our space.
This week left me a bit shaken but also taught me a tip to use when its my group’s turn to Facilitate. Passion is super great however one needs not get too attached to the subject matter that they personalize the content. Why? simply because it leads to one now finding the feedback no longer as what it is (feedback) but rather now as attacks that need to be defended.
The exercise that we did on the Brain dominance etc. made me realize that we cannot all be the same, in our groups there will be differences however they need to embraced. you must not (that’s just a note to self) force people to think and do as you do, because we are programmed differently thus we look achieve the same goal just the ways will not be the same and it a good thing.
Above all I think my son benefitted more from this class as since this class I’ve learned to just let him be him and not enforce the do like I do philosophy I’ve been using for the past 4 year. Honestly our relationship has improved, have more patience for him than before so says my mother.
on the week of the story telling yes I enjoyed the group presentation but like a few the whole emphases on Madiba by the group, put me off a bit but I told myself to look beyond that. The message that the group portrayed is not just about Madiba but about the impact of stories on our lives, how they shape us, our opinions and view of society.
I learned that we are privileged as a country to have such a varied cultures and traditions, that we pride ourselves in. the story of Zanele Mbeki and the two women touched a nerve with me in that as a nation in celebration of our history and tradition we sort of demonized a part of us. Yes we all admit that Afrikaans we associate with apartheid and tragedy, however there is always two sides to a story. Imagen having to disregard your culture and trading due to shame. I found myself asking question like what if any good do I know about the Afrikaner culture? is there really such little information about the culture or do we choose to ignore it and focus more on the bad?
I finally settled on that, just like other culture and traditions Afrikaner culture is marginalized and misrepresented. only one narrative is relayed about it.
This week taught me a lot about not just how to communicate with others but also my own self. this was the first time groups had to present and us to give feedback, it made me realize that am too much a fan of Critique more than just feedback. I realized that I am so accustomed to always looking at and for faults that I hardly compliment or acknowledge hard work.
A lot of people were commenting the group on how they managed to come up with such a great piece given the little time they had and I was sitting there thinking but they should have do such and such and didn’t. now after a few weeks I can safely say credit was due they set the bar high.
honestly I felt confused and had thoughts like what am I doing here. confusion is all that I saw however as the day progressed it became more enjoyable and Roslyn(Pardon me if I’ve butchered your name) has a very infectious personality and just makes you want join in and have some.
it felt more like therapy at times and I feel it has opened me up even more