All posts by Mary Tlalinyane

Week 9 Feedback

Today topic was Building Shared Understanding. It was a bit different as Roslyn was not there. We learnt about change and why it is difficult to accept change because of fear. We have to go through change whether good or bad. Change make you uncomfortable, some people love change, change makes better, no change no growth. Not sure what will happen, the fear of unknown. How important to check other people’s perceptions before making changes. – preceptive is one way of thinking – private domain, gossip, silent protest and resistance.  – deal with the change with families, work places, schools and everywhere. We learnt about The Joharo Window which communication theory. Become aware of self, awareness of each other. – transparent arena, known to both self and others. – blindspot, others know, person self is unaware. Hidden area, known to self and unknown to others. – unknown are unknown to self and others. C – courage, H – humble, I – interdependent, V – vulnerable, E – excellent. The next topic was Scarf Model – status – other sense of worth, certainty, our sense of clarity, Autonomy, our sense of control, relatedness. Our sense of safety, be part of the group, fairness, our sense of fair exercise. Interesting, I have learnt a lot so far.

Week 8 Feedback

This time around I attended morning class due personal issues. The topic which was facilitated was Pain. One of the team members addressed us that she was sidelined, was not given the opportunity to participate when the group was facilitating.  The advice given was that facilitators  can  spend time with group to address the issue, they must communicate .  As the matter was said to the participants or audience. The participants cannot debate the matter as it will be waste of time. We must learn to tolerant and respect each other, listen to each other ideas. We must sometimes comprises . take ourselves to balcony in order to figure out what has happened. We did the string activity with Roslyn. As we were paired and we were unable to disconnect ourselves from this string. It was mentioned that if you come across the same go to the centre of the problem.  Don’t get frustrated, don’t give up as a team, stop trying and stop communicating, skip out and get help.  How to resolve the conflict on a team. Keep focus on a team. A team must have a goal or vision that is shared by everyone. If you have the same vision or goal that team has a purpose. A purpose give you a passion , the purpose is why, have a clear why in a team. Communicate in order to get a teamwork, collaboration, dedication, open ness have sense of urgency.  Rules of engagement, what is permissible and what is not permissible. With resources one cannot think creatively. Lead a team, you are a team leader in anyway. Same page, collaborate, share same vision. Learn to empower others by communicating, storming, debating and norming/informing, team performs well together. How to turn a team into negative conflict to positive conflict, don’t kill the conflict, get people heard, resolve the conflict go to the balcony. Interesting.

Week 7 Feedback

  • Today we have to submit our draft reflective essay together with 6 blogs. I came to the morning class due to personal commitments. I joined  group 2 as I am also in group 2 in the afternoon class. Most of the people in this group are just doing Facilitation Skills course to get points in order to graduate. The talk a lot about their personal stuff than concentrating. They also contribute and participate more on sharing ideas unlike my morning group whom we are all at the early stage. I really enjoyed myself  the atmosphere was really different. Roslyn gave more information on how to prepare the final reflective essay. In this essay she wants to know if you have learnt anything. There is no need to mention on how other groups facilitated as she was also there when they were facilitating. Did we learn anything that can be useful when we finished the course. She also gave us a assessment sheet/form to see how are we going to be assessed. The facilitating group talk us how to manage time, tracker for work and life in general. We did the activity on the wheel of life which quadrant do we operate from, for example, urgent important like deadline, do now, not urgent but important, do soon. Urgent not important avoid it. Not urgent not important limit it. Next was 4 stages of learning which are unconscious incompetent, awareness, I don’t know what I don’t know or what I have to learn, conscious incompetence, interest, aware of what I have to learn but I don’t know how to do it. Conscious competent trial conscious of what I am doing or I can do it but I need to think about it when I am doing it. Last was  unconscious competent and 3 factors that governed the journey of proficiency: motivation inspire to do, opportunity possible to do and capability able to do. This was copied from Roslyn Facilitatation  Skills notebook 2018. We also learnt about 3 dimensional thinking, different types of learning and reflecting. First is the event of the behavior, and results. If I change my perception my system will change, patterns in the system, go to work and change the way you communicate  how  has the world has changed for me, how can I change my world in the future. If I can change everything changes. We accept what is going on and have not climbed the ladder. After this course we will change the pattern of thinking and communicating.

Feed back on week 6

Resolving Conflict.  This was a second full day class again. When we get there the room set up was already done. The facilitating group was wearing red aprons to define conflict. The topic and members of the group were perfectly introduced. The topic was clearly played and interacted perfectly with the audience. We have learnt different techniques  of how to resolve conflicts which are control, accomodating others, avoiding and comprising. Collaborating with each other helps a lot in facilitation groups. If you avoid your team members you might miss important opportunities. We were given sweets with a card saying “LETS WORK IT OUT” with the word vertically written RESOLVE,  R – reach out, come together with the person you are having conflict with. E – engage in a  conversation, remain calm and make sure to talk one at a time. S – seek to solve the problem, agree to come up with sensible solutions you both can accept. O – open up , calmly communicate your side of story to explain how you feel. L – listen intently, listen to the other person so that you understand their point of view. V – voice solutions, brainstorm solution to resolve your conflict together. E – end on a good note, agree to the solutions; give a compliment and shake hands. All these ideas one can use in day to day life, at work places, home, church, everywhere.  After lunch the afternoon facilitating group took over. The room set up as well as the topic of Building Relationship. Theme was played very well which reflected more of the team work and more of the interaction with some part of the audience. Their objective was ” getting to understand the impact our actions have on other people and how other people’s actions impact on us. Different traits were discussed and given by the audience, like; communicate freely, reliable, having common goals etc.  Back to Roslyn, we were still on clear thinking, mental models, here we hear through our lens of thinking the world.  The structures are filters, how to create a trust, deletion, I don’t know until you tell me, select data. Distortions picture of the world, take information to fit into my head. The last one generalisation, general thinking about people. We also learnt about RAS The Reticular Activating System, looking what we except. You don’t get what you want but you get what you deserve. We were still on clear thinking, The decimal spiral, we have two options, self reinforcing loop assumptions and beliefs make you to select your own data, self fulfilling loop, everything based on the data I selected, I select the data that fulfills myself. 1 sense something 2 select information 3 interpret what you saw and make assumptions make meaning 4 feel bad if not selected 5 assumptions make beliefs 6 conclude on something – assumptions come to a decision on conclusion. We also touched on communication intelligence, the excerise was done even though I was late which taught me not to be quick to judge on others. The next exercise was to be in 2 pairs and write each other story. We have learnt to say or write a story, you pause and reflect on the story. We have learnt 4 phases of communication 1 download, information I tell you and you tell me 2 debate knock down, me me 3 conversation I tell the truth my own point of view 4 collaboration a dialogue, share a story with open mind. Learn with awareness, meaning of your communication is the response you get from other person. Sense what you are talking about , interpret what to say feeling for the story. Personal mastering, how you behave has no plan and no impact. There is a reality that belongs to me, we see the world as we are. Relationship, the deeper the relationship the higher the risk. There is hurt ( hurt of loss of identity and loss of who I am). We learnt about protective circle; there is a relationship, risk, hurt, you withdraw and reclaim back your identity. We all have responsibility being a position or situation. Take responsibility and take action, be responsible rather than to blame. Responsibility, the ability to response to what I chose. I have learnt a lot in one day and had fun as usual.

Seeing with different eyes Week 5

  1. It was a full day class, 2 classes combined together. It was chaos as we all had to bring old shoes and put them in 2 baskets. We were asked to pick up a pair of shoes and try them on. To my surprise most of the people including myself refused as it will be uncomfortable to put on someone’s shoes. The lesson was how you feel to be homeless. If you are homeless you accept anything given to you. The facilitation group didn’t introduce themselves as well as the topic. I thought the topic was Homelessness instead of Seeing with different eyes. It was more of the presentation, awareness than facilitation. I was impressed with the comprehensive research on homelessness. I have learnt that if you see homeless people in the street don’t judge them. The group didn’t intract with the audience that much but we have learnt a lot, like that there are more homeless males than females. Respect, assist them in anyway possible. Now when I see homeless people I have more understanding to their situation. I empathize with them and I am prepared to assist more than before especially those that are around my area. We are all still learning but we must try our best to do a proper research on how to facilitate. Second session we formed groups of 4 each group. Each person has to talk for 5 minutes about ” Recall a time when you felt part of something significant, a time you felt alive “. We shared this topic but my group didn’t understand the instructions they all went to bathroom when they came the time was almost over. 4 of us we had to share like 10 minutes. Instead of talking they Started writing down what they are going  to say. The lesson is to listen to instructions and ask if you didn’t get them clearly. We also learnt to listen without interruptions or asking questions.  The next session was about wheel learning. The learning was to prepare people’s mind of thinking before facilitating.  I have also learnt that there are many truths. Double clicking was also another interesting lesson. In double clicking we have discovered different meaning of words. We look at things differently as human beings. Any question’s answer depend on the  content, history or background, environment and time. All the words carry meaning and be careful as our views are different. After lunch the two groups were divided up again. Facilitation group for afternoon took over. They were dressed smart in uniform. The room set up was done well . The introduction of the topic and members was done well. I felt that the group or its members  have facilitated before. The interaction was good , they were experts. They have taught us about EFT,  EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUES, which is the excellent exercise. We have learnt the difference between perception and assumption. Perceptions are influenced by motivations, expectations, culture, emotions, attitude and believes. People perceive different things in different ways. We are build to make assumptions, translate assumptions into reality. Human beings are wise to assumptions, we make means of the world. Assumptions are healthy if no criticism as per Roslyn. Unconscious bias, attribution bias make certain assumptions, conformity bias, convey by majority, similarity bias, similar to me. Contrast effect when someone is different. Beauty bias, appearance, gender bias male and female, ethnicity bias racial bias, in/out group bias. I was a bit confused until we had an exercise. The last one was iceberg, tell a story inside outside about information we have selected and we a decision. The day was long and tiring but I have learnt  a lot and I had fun.

Week 4 Feedbabk

Today I was a bit late rushing to get to my class to find out that everyone was waiting outside for the facilitating group to do room set up. Their topic was Honouring Differences, the theme was learning about different kinds of black women’s hair styles. The topic was one-sided because it was only about black African women hair styles.  I love their room set up even though their music did not exactly go with a topic. I was a bit confused because sometimes the facilitating group was talking at the same time. I have learnt to do a proper research of the topic and make sure that you manage your time. I have learnt that don’t turn your interaction with your audience into a dialogue or argument. With any topic try to include all the nationalities as South African is a rainbow nation. If ever possible choose the theme that is not sensitive. Debrief the audience if the topic or theme is sensitive. Roslyn debriefed us by talking about different stigmas mostly imposed on us by people. I have noticed that almost everyone have stigmas. There are stigmas in ranks and powers. I have also learnt that a person does not own a stigma because most of the time stigmas are imposed on people. One can choose to live without a stigma. Step out of that whatever stigma. Disclose it and make it normal. Another interesting topic we have learnt was Thinking Style Preferences. I have found out that I am left brain thinker, 89%, logic, comfortable with rules. Sensory preference, I have auditory style, 73%, transfer of information through listening.  Information sorting style,  I am detail, 89% information is presented in the orderly manner. Learning style, initiator 64% keen to new ideas. Even though some of the characters of the initiator I don’t agree, example being an extrovert or that I don’t enjoy repetition and practice of activities. Motivational preference, I am internal with 89%, more details information that’s me. All in all what we have learnt opened my eyes. I have asked my 4 coworkers to do the assessment and the feedback was interesting as we have notice that we have a lot in common. My 2 boys also have done the assessment, this as well will assist in their studies. This course is so interesting as everyday you learn something you know but in a different way, professional way. We closed we interesting exercises.

Group 3 Story Telling

On this day, Third Group was facilitating on ” Story Telling “. It was exciting to watch other people facilitating as our group was done. The group was well prepared, even though I was a bit worried when they started talking to themselves not engaging the audience. But thank God they turned to audience later. I liked the way they handled their topic and the different kinds of facilitation tools were used. I was not aware that story telling can be another way of facilitation. We have learnt different kinds of facilitation which was amazing. Like someone narrating his or her life story. I have also learnt that in order to understand a story you have to read it several times for more understanding. In whatever one do be honest, there is no need to lie about any situation. I enjoyed the chocolates and I had fun

Group 2 Facilitation

This was our day as Group 2. Our topic ” Communication via social media “. Four of us in a group were all panicking and nervous, as we all have never facilitated before. I was laughing,  one lady thought I was the facilitator as it was her first day, and that gave me courage. We were all excited once finished facilitating as we were receiving positive feedbacks. We also received encouraging feedbacks where went wrong or what should have happened. I have learnt a lot, teamwork, accepting criticism in a positive way not personal. The facilitation gave some kind of confidence to stand in front of the audience which I will use more in future. I also have learnt to engage more as a group in whatever we do together. My confidence has grown a bit since this facilitation. I have learnt how to check in and out for the first, you listen without questions. Next time I will not read from paper when facilitating but I will prepare myself more. I am loving this course more every day

First day feedback

Action Learning Blog
Feedback on my first day
It was my first day to attend the Facilitation Skills class. I was prepared and looking forward to start,
to my surprise the class was fully packed. I had to sit almost at the back. In any class I prefer to sit in
front row because of my eye sight problems. This actually made me to panic a little bit, how is this
lecturer going to handle such a big class. The worse part I had to sit in the back.
Coming through we were advised to collect a book and a number and have a sit. We sat listening to
Roslyn explaining to us how the calendar is going to work. Most of them were late and distracting us
in class.
I am not sure how this course is going to be relevant to me because I was advised to do it before I can
register for General BA degree. Anyway it might be relevant to the work I am currently doing as I am
a conveyancing paralegal. I deal with clients daily and this will assist me how to handle them.
Teamwork with my co-workers will also assist.
The course also added value because now I understand a little bit about facilitation because I thought
is the same thing as presentation.
The course has change me, I must now learn how to ask questions and give ideas as well. Teamwork,
be more involved in whatever a team or group has to do. We are even free to ask any kind of questions
as well.
I have notice that one cannot facilitate alone without forming a group. In our class we were advised
to clear the floor by putting desks and chairs aside. We created groups as per the numbers we picked
when coming in. Whatsapp group was created for communication purposes. Everything is about
putting information together. Forms with group details were completed. We also had a register on
Roslyn’s laptop.
We had a break. After the break our group 2 was used as an example on how to facilitate. We were
promised 10% marks upfront. We had a group discussion about our topic “Communication via social
media”. As a group we arranged everything on how to facilitate this topic to our classmates.
At the end of the class I had fun and I was relieved.